The Wingman

Recently I posted a thread on Thailand Friends indicating I was looking for a wingman. While the topic didn't interest the women it certainly attracted the attention of the guys. I've compiled my own definition based on several replies to my thread and an entry at Urban Dictionary by a fellow Canadian Steve Nizzero to whom I give much credit.

What is a wingman?
A wingman is someone you bring along on outings (i.e. bar hopping, shopping, events) to help you out with women. The wingman is there to "occupy" the least attractive girl of a pair so that you may focus your attention on the hot girl. This is referred to as "ridin' the moped" which is derived from the following old joke:

Q: How are mopeds and fat chicks alike?

A: They're both fun to ride until your friends see you.

And is used as follows:

Friend volunteering to operate as wingman for the evening: Looks like I'll be ridin' the moped tonight.

Why does the wingman exist?
Often when an attractive girl is out with an ugly friend she feels an obligation to look after that friend thus making herself untouchable. When the wingman is used both girls are approached by the men and the wingman automatically engages in conversation with the ugly girl. Essentially the wingman role exists to allow you to isolate your target comfortably by severing her obligatory tie with her friend.

What does the wingman do?
The wingman approaches first in a non-threatening way and makes his intentions clear on the ugly chick. Now that the hot friend sees that her friend has finally found a man she is free to start scouting. This is where you come in "unexpectedly" and "accidentally" and begin catching up on old times with the wingman. The wingman then attempts to isolate his target (i.e. the ugly chick) resulting in one of two outcomes:

1. She tells her hot friend to come along in which case you automatically MUST be invited since you know the wingman and have already been introduced.
2. They leave giving you ample space to work on the hot girl since you've already established a rapport as being a good friend of a seamingly non-shallow kind of guy and by association you must therefore be a good catch.
   

At the end of the night after you have worked your magic the wingman, AND ONLY THE WINGMAN, offers the girls to come back to his place for a little after party. Once everyone arrives, the wingman occupies the ugly girl IN ANOTHER ROOM, leaving you and the hot chick alone so that you can get it on like Donkey Kong.

How do I find a wingman?
First and foremost keep in mind that a wingman should never be too inexperienced or he will hold you back. The wingman should always be of equal or greater knowledge than you. Your wingman is an invaluable assistant so don't underestimate finding one that complements you. Learning and practicing the wingman support system will provide you with an unbelievable asset if done right. You can try classifieds or forums when looking for a wingman. Believe it or not most guys understand the role and are likely in a similar position meaning as long as you're prepared to swap roles once in a while you'll have no trouble finding applicants. After all we all have to jump on a grenade at some point.

Are there variations?
There are hundreds of variations including the use of a female wingman which if done correctly can have even better effect. In this approach it is clearly not her intention to bed the ugly chick (although this does make for a creative and welcome variation) but rather pump up your image by laughing at your jokes and making you appear like a social god. Women respond well to guys that can interact in social situations with members of the opposite sex thus a female wingman is likely to lead you to scoring even more quickly.

Do I need a wingman?
There are always social misfits with egos as big as a house that are convinced they are a one man show. I agree that this can be done but if you think you're a solid solo routine you should realize that women are more attracted to guys that can demonstrate social skills in a group or with people other than the target. As such human psychology would disagree with these self-proclaimed experts who more often than not come off creepy. Some girls are forgiving but don't ever confuse polite tolerance with attraction or interest.

For more information check out the Wingman's Handbook. I'd love to give credit to the author but can't find the source so if you're out there let me know and I'll make you a star!

Oh and if you're wondering...yes amidst the typical forum trolls and rants I found several good wingman.